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about

this songs another one of the more personal songs. i guess im kind of talking to myself as my mum or really anyone who loves me as im telling them of my plans to kill myself (many moons ago). Or i guess more appropriately, after I had already decided to kill myself and had gotten the necessary items to do so with. so yeah...wicked personal. radass!

lyrics

you nearly lost control
and youve such a heavy soul
and i cant help but wonder
its tearing me asunder
is this all worth it
you didnt think i noticed you glowed

credits

from Etla​/​Phasma​/​Exla​/​Mer (or siddhartha), released August 17, 2014
everyone who deals with my incessantly crummystew life and makes it worth it: mum and the bruthas. cortlan, chelsea c., agatha, beth, carine, chorduroy, dreadlocks, Dusty, skrimp, derek, taylor, leeann( i misspelled your name i know), royce (one of the sweetest cats) Jacy( i miss you, buddy holly) Demi the darkness, crispin (all the cool nigs from french class) justin B., Vonte, Alex, mattandmandy, haroon the (ex?)pun-slim, Johnathon, jake (even though we never talk, the moongirls-era will still be an amazing time in my life) abby(what a punk rock chick, i was never sad around her), neb (i still listen to blood iron and atticus finch and the mockingbirds so it was neccesary to include him), stub (your graffitti...beautiful), Teeth(your graffitti was radass, and meeting you that one time was radass) anna(thanks fur letting a homeless schemp stay at your place) chrisandjenni (couldnt tell them how much i love them with all the words in my heart. actually, screw chris. on second thought, hes awesome.), annie hall, aleesa (hey, youre kewl) carluhh and amelia and jacqui, flo( there was a time where i needed to meet someone like you) DEFNE BOZDOGAN (i miss you eternally) Jen, Jared Mcnair, kaylyn middleT, kelsey and devin and all the other drunks they knew (devin excluded from the drunk part), nicolette The dance, Tori osborne, vic grimmus, and anyone else im forgetting, im sorry but i seriously doubt anyone read this far anyone. oh, and arturo i guess, he makes carine happy, and hes pretty...gosh darn funny.

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goodnight, moon image

goodnight, moon Colombia

Born from the late Antigone shortly after her suicide, the first night i slept i dreamed of my own future death. It was beautiful and frightening and she came back for me in the end. Alas---too late to stuff the bones back in the skin; to sing life where blood should be is quite risky business. ... more

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